2017 Phoenix InterAmerica’s Hash Trail Sign-Ups

On Friday, 10/6/17 at 4pm you will be able to go to Eventbrite (www.eventbrite.com) and sign up for all Saturday and Sunday trails. This synopsis pertains only to Saturday and Sunday’s trails. (Friday Welcome Trail and Monday Hangover Trail will be open to all that skirt 69 Ways To Die in The West…so you’ll just need to show up!)

Also here under the Trails section: CLICK

If anyone wants to threaten their closest friendships, see the most demure person lose their mind, orchestrate a 10069 comment fb thread, or play it fast and loose(!) with acceptable noise levels, try debating trail sign up’s for large hash events. Maybe in November we’ll look at each other in the eye again? I’m kidding? I’m kidding…kind of ;).

1st Question:  Technology is in bed with Heineken, and I prefer my abacus or at least a dumb-phone, how can I sign up for a trail? I am from another country and have no access to an International plan, what do I do? I don’t know how to work Eventbrite. I will be without cell service or on a plane on Friday.
1st Answer:  Phone a friend. Sidle on up to a millennial and ask for a tutorial or just give them your log in and have them sign you up. 2000 people, you’ve got this. Ask a stranger at a gas station, whatever works. Get their number while you are at it. Ask friends for help. The Pointe Hilton Squaw Peak also has a business center with a computer that may be used.

2nd Question:  Will Eventbrite crash with everyone trying to do it(#) at once?
2nd Answer: Eventbrite is a large and proven ticketing system, and it is free! We have no reason to believe there will be an issue there. Plan B would be paper sign up’s Friday night, but we very much do not think this is realistically going to not work.

C Question:  But I thought you were doing 6:01am trail sign ups?
C Answer:  We know that was a “popular” option, but we just want to watch the world burn.

4th Question:  I couldn’t get on my first or second choice of trail, they filled up immediately! What do I do?
4th Answer:  No one quite understands, but Phoenix seems to keep breaking sell out records faster than Liar Liar Crotch On Fire can run the beer mile. We’d suggest you have a ranked list of picks for your preferred trails, 1st-5th choices, hell, maybe 1st-10th! Go down you list. You can also sign up for both Saturday and Sunday then, so chances are if you hustle you can get favorable trails in your eyes. Truly, we are behind every trail we are throwing, there is not a bad one! An immense amount of work has been put into these trails.

5th Question:  How do I know what trails I would like so I can plan my fastest fingers in the west routine for Friday?
5th Answer:  Trail summaries will be posted on the website ahead of time, probably by 9/1/17. They are also being printed as part of a book that you will receive as a gimme the weekend of. You can look everything over and figure out what is best for you and go from there. There will be a picture or two for each trail as well.

F Question:  Why not paper sign ups?
F Answer:  Queues. Physically needing to remove yourself from whatever awesome time you are having to get in said line.

6.9th  Question:  Why sign-ups at all? Just get on a bus. The other bus is always gonna suck! Silly overly Mismanagementy Phoenix hashers!
6.9th Answer:  Have you seen 2000 people in one place? Have you seen them try to fit through a bus door? How about emotionally charged chaos while holding hands and running from bus to bus as you just miss a cut off for space on one. How fun is queuing outside in a parking lot in AZ heat for G knows how long? Or worse, a beer less mob of people uncertain on if they are about to do a Ballbuster or a 3 mile trail?

8th Question:  Why Friday at 4pm?
8th Answer:  We expect nearly everyone to be in AZ by then with internet access, few/no more rego transfers, and you have 1-2 sleeps to get on board with whatever you have signed up for. Probably by Friday you have already hooked up(!) with new and old hasher friends, and if you wish, you can try to get on the same trail. Gotta lay that groundwork for the next evening or else cuddle yourself. There is a slim hope you won’t be too intoxicated at 4pm, no need to interrupt the Welcome Trail, and it is early enough for us to get lists printed and finalize anything unforeseen afterwards. Who are we kidding, you are probably going to be too intoxicated…it’s worth a shot.

9th Question:  I overslept. I changed my mind. I didn’t get on the trail I signed up for. I’m a half-mind, I’m a drunk, and I want to hash!
9th Answer:  Everyone signed up for a trail will need to be on their bus 10 minutes ahead of when it leaves and all checked in with the bus captain. You sign up on Eventbrite and get a spot, it is your seat, and it is promised! Hard line on timing for Saturday/Sunday trails, NOT hash time. In the last 10 minutes before the bus departs, anyone not on the bus that signed up for the trail loses their spot, and anyone there that wants to can just get on-on! If you REALLY mess up and oversleep you can always do the Zippy Trail around the hotel, or do the trail that leaves from the hotel and is bus free! That said, the trails are stellar, drag your bruised liver out of bed and fill those buses. It’s worth it.

10th Question:  This is stupid. You should have done ________. I don’t want to even go anymore.
10th Answer:  Please bid for 2019 InterAm and put us in our place at http://www.phoenixhhh.com/details/schedule-of-events/bidding/. Please sell your rego for $199 at http://www.phoenixhhh.com/details/sign-up/. #screwphoenix

K Question:  (Insert question on Trail Sign-Up’s that isn’t addressed here)
K Answer:  (TBD)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *