Lost Boobs #144 Hash Trash
September 30, 2013 – “Angry Hand Jobs”
Why is everyone so ANGRY??
If you have to go to a hash in Ahwatukee (“The largest cul-de-sac in America!!”), you might be angry.
If your co-hare (Grapes of Wrath) neglects to mark trail and instead chalks “masterpieces” of bunches of grapes, you might be angry (Sand Job).
If you didn’t go to “No Sissies” (and therefore missed naked hashing six times and whatever it means when you yell “LeRoy!” and run around naked some more), you might be angry.
If you couldn’t find the trail and kept doing it backwards, (depending on which side of “backwards” you might have been on and whether you like that sort of thing), you might be angry.
If you were trying to get your baby to sleep and 80 or so hashers ran by your house, you might be angry.
If a dense, shirtless guy threatened you with a firearm for allegedly waking up his baby, you might be angry.
If you missed the best QOTN: “I can’t wait til I’m married and fat and hate everyone around me!” (Flux Incapacitated), you might be angry.
If you had to pay your gas bill on your phone instead of enjoying beer near (Virgin Just Frank and others who had tech on trail), you might be angry.
If you are a dog and missed the “dog naming circle”, you might be angry.
Just Ginger will be known as “I Punched a Bitch”
Just Taffy will be known as “Wishboner” or Wish Bone Her or some variation thereof.
Just Nikki, will be known as Asstricks. Apparently she does tricks, and also had to butt scoot through circle to clean out her anal glands (who hasn’t?). But it was hard to believe she did tricks when she wouldn’t even come when Scarlet Petter called her.
In the category of human namings, Just Chris (aka Saint Chris or Our Lady of LBH – in whose name you can light a candle or activate a glow bracelet) was named Stumbellina!
And Just Mark was named “Wanna Meet My Dog?” since that is his trademark pick-up line. Good luck WMMD?!